Inappropriate
12-1-2017
I just want to jot down a few thoughts on the
insanity that has gripped America in recent months. In much the same way that
tattoos and piercings became fashionable, weeping and wailing about
inappropriate behavior in the workplace has become the “thing to do”.
Bill Cosby, America’s favorite “dad” figure,
really got the ball rolling. He is accused of unwanted sexual advances, which,
in itself is offensive, but he aggravated his situation by drugging, and raping
the unconscious victims.
The law of averages declares that a certain
small percentage of the accusations are false, but there is no justifying the
ones that are genuine.
Nevertheless, each incident must be examined
individually to determine the exact degree of wrongdoing. In many cases, there
is no wrongdoing, and the accuser becomes the offending party.
The women of today, (and I generalize to a
degree) are into cosmetic procedures, including implants, ornamental piercings,
and excessive (in my opinion) makeup. Very short skirts and plunging necklines
are all the rage, and woe unto him that casts his gaze in an inappropriate
direction for an inappropriate length of time.
I am glad to be a man. I enjoy sex, and all of
the feelings associated with it. I am aroused by beautiful women, especially
the ones that allow their natural beauty to shine, unenhanced. I have been
approached with unwanted advances, and I never felt anything more than
flattered. I have to wonder how many cases of flattery are misinterpreted by a
less than brilliant recipient. How many cases involve advances that are
encouraged, and after a disagreement, become a source of litigation?
Geraldo Rivera suggests that courtship could
become an endangered species. I think it would be funny if all of the men on
the planet were to withhold sex for a period, long enough to bring an end to
this madness.
I empathize with both sides of this issue. I
have held positions of importance where I was required to “kiss ass” in order
to advance my position. I didn’t last very long at those places. I know that
there are situations where sexual favors are a requirement in order for one to
even be considered for a position. This influences the quality of the thing
that is being produced. It eliminates talented individuals that want to be
considered on their merits. It also stains the product with individuals of
questionable ethics, not to mention the ethics of the individuals responsible
for production.
There are individuals that approve of
inappropriate behavior in the workplace. Let me give an example.
I know of a woman, married twenty years,
working in an office where she was groomed by the boss. She had become tired of
her situation at home. Her husband wasn’t abusive, but had become
“indifferent”, and withdrawn. Alcohol replaced his need for companionship. She
felt flattered, and wanted, as her boss promoted her, and started asking her
out on “dates”. Eventually, she asked her husband for a divorce, and ended up
marrying her boss. This is called “courtship”. Men pursue women, and women
pursue men. If the pursuit is unwanted, a simple “NO” should be enough to stop
it. If the job requires submission, then we must decide if it is worth it. Many
people feel that a position is worth giving up their self-esteem for, and,
maybe later, they decide that it was a poor choice. This is when individuals
must take responsibility for their own poor choices. It has become fashionable
to shift this blame. It’s not enough to say ‘shame on you”. We want you fired,
whipped, and left to starve on the side of the road. And, “oh boy” I can sue
for millions!
I am not trying to trivialize what is
happening. I am merely offering a view of the other side of the issue. If we
were to punish everyone for having natural urges, then I should be at the top
of the list. I have never been guilty of unwanted advances simply because I am
extremely shy. The women that know me will testify that I am “harmless”. There
are, however, many predators on the prowl, and I don’t know of any defense
against this sort of behavior. This is not something that is new. It was much
worse in days gone by, and has steadily improved over time.
Now, I want to discuss another side to the
issue. There are claims that people are being paid to fabricate stories,
intended to harm people aspiring to positions of leadership. Benefitting from
the momentum created by legitimate cases, this has become a political tool.
Once again, we are thinning the field, eliminating potentially excellent
candidates, and leaving space for an undesirable contender.
I am unable to offer a solution, or even, steps
toward a solution. It is up to the individual to stand up for what they believe
in.
There are so many problems in the world. It
seems tragic to me that so much coverage and attention is being devoted to an
issue which is best resolved by the individual.
That’s all I have to say about that!
I GUESS I DO HAVE MORE TO SAY
ABOUT THAT!
It is the 27th of
September, 2018. I am watching the Kavanaugh hearing.
No-one will ever know the truth except the individuals involved, Kavanaugh, or Dr. Ford.
I think if Dr. Ford had a problem 37 years ago, then would have been a
good time to complain. One senator suggested the burden of proof was on the
accuser. (the old “innocent ‘til proven guilty beyond
a shadow of a doubt” idea) I don’t see any shadows here! Do you?
To be continued, reluctantly